Max Roach Quartet, originally uploaded by jazzmiddelheim.
I’m sad.
Max Roach, one of the greatest (jazz) drummers of all time passed away yesterday. I’m trying to think of something profound to write, but all I can say is that I’m going to miss his playing.
Many weeks ago (actually, it may have been last week, I can’t remember) I was tagged by The Big Seester for the “Six Weird Things About You” meme. Now that things have slowed down a little, I have some time to share with y’all those things that make me different from the rest of the world ….
Well, the TTC and the city of Toronto have completely blown all the rumours out of the water. Yesterday all of the speculation said, “$2 billion and 60-80km of LRT line”. Today, the official announcement read “$6 billion and 120km of LRT line”. That’s damned impressive. What’s also impressive is that they’ve put up an entire website devoted to the project. Now if only London Transit and the city of London could make the full report for their proposed reorganization of transit here available online …
I may have more to say about the details of the plan in a day or two. In the meantime, visit this link for the scoop
As some of the faithful readers may know, I used to live in Toronto. One of the neighbourhoods that I lived in had a wonderful theatre (only about 2 blocks from my house) that played second-run and foreign films. It was great. At a time when the big movie chains were charging about $7 or $8 admission, The Revue (and others in the chain) were charging only $4 ($2.50/film if you purchased a 10-film pass). Sure, the seats weren’t the most comfortable, the screen wasn’t enormous, the sound wasn’t deafening, but it was a great place to watch movies. And it was close to home. I could decide 15 minutes before showtime that I wanted to see a movie and still be there with plenty of time to spare. Here’s how the theatre used to look:
I recently heard that the entire chain had been closed, which was sad to hear. Just a few minutes ago I was reading a transit-centric blog and there was a post about how the marquee had collapsed (apparently due to the weight of snow and ice). What a shame. Here’s a photo of the collapsed marquee:
I swear, you can’t make this crap up.
Someone found yet another way to rip people off – get them to pay for a test tube so they can (I kid you not) “capture the breath of a loved one or friend and keep them close. Forever.”
For crying out loud! I can’t even begin to explain how monumentally stupid this is! I wish I could, but I’m speechless.
<sigh>
Bill Maher’s New Rules For 2007
New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for Classmates.com! There’s a reason you don’t talk to people for 25 years – because you don’t particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days – mowing my lawn.
New Rule: Don’t eat anything that’s served to you out a window unless you’re a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy’s chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain? Lobster?
New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: “lucky”.
New Rule: If you need to shave and you still collect baseball cards, you’re a dope. If you’re a kid, the cards are keepsakes of your idols. If you’re a grown man, they’re pictures of men.
New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here’s how much men care about your eyebrows: Do you have two of them? Okay, we’re done.
New Rule: There’s no such thing as flavoured water. There’s a whole aisle of this crap at the supermarket – water, but without the watery taste. Sorry, but flavoured water is called a soft drink. You want flavoured water? Pour some scotch over ice and let it melt. That’s your flavoured water.
New Rule: Stop screwing with old people. Target is introducing a redesigned pill bottle that’s square, with a bigger label. And the top is now the bottom. And by the time grandpa figures out how to open it, his ass will be in the morgue. Congratulations, Target, you just solved the Social Security crisis.
New Rule: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the jerk. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a “decaf grande, half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double shot, gingerbread cappucino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet ‘n’ Low, and one Nutra-Sweet,” oooh, you’re a huge jerk.
New Rule: I’m not the cashier! By the time I look up from sliding my card, entering my PIN, pressing “Enter,” verifying the amount, deciding, no, I don’t want cash back, and pressing “Enter” again, the kid who is supposed to be ringing me up is standing there eating my Almond Joy.
New Rule: Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn’t make you spiritual. It’s right above the crack of your ass and it translates to “Beef with Broccoli”. The last time you did anytihng spiritual, you were praying to God you weren’t pregnant. You’re not spiritual, you’re just high.
New Rule: Competitive eating isn’t a sport. It’s one of the seven deadly sins. ESPN recently televised the U.S. Open of Competitive Eating, because watching those athletes at the poker table was just too damned exciting. What’s next, competitive farting? Oh wait, they’re already doing that. It’s called “The Howard Stern Show”.
New Rule: I don’t need bigger, mega M&Ms. If I’m extra hungry for M&Ms I’ll go nuts and eat two.
New Rule: If you’re going to insist on making movies based on crappy, old television shows, then you have to give everyone in the Cineplex a remote so we can see what’s playing on the other screens. Let’s remember the reason something was a television show in the first place is that the idea wasn’t good enough to be in a movie.
New Rule: No more gift registries. You know, it used to be just for weddings. Now it’s for babies and new homes and graduations from rehab. Picking out the stuff you want and having people buy it for you isn’t gift giving, it’s the white people version of looting.
New Rule: And this one is long overdue: No more bathroom attendants. After I zip up, some guy is offering me a towel and a mint like I just had sex with George Michael. I can’t even tell if he’s supposed to be there or just some freak with a fetish. I don’t want to be on your webcam, dude. I just want to wash my hands.
New Rule: When I ask how old your toddler is, I don’t want to hear “27 months.” “He’s two” will do just fine. He’s not a cheese. And I didn’t really care in the first place.
New Rule: If you ever hope to be a credible adult and want a job that pays better than minimum wage, then for God’s sake don’t pierce or tattoo every available piece of flesh. If so, then plan your future around saying, “Do you want fries with that?”
Ever since the powers-that-be began releasing TV shows on DVD, I’ve been waiting (and waiting and waiting and waiting) for WKRP in Cincinnati to be released. It turns out I’ve only got to wait a few more months!
We were at Ikea on Saturday and this was one of those things that just screamed “get out the phone and take a picture!!”
